in Personal

Thoughts on Love

I’ve never been in love.  I’ve thought I’ve been in love a couple of times in my life, but in retrospect, I have to admit I was disillusioned.  I should also add that my observations of my peers in love have been less than what I imagined too.  So many times, I look at those around me, and I wonder why they allow themselves to be chained down, to be controlled by someone else.  I’ve always imagined love as ultimate freedom, much like God has shown us.  I mean, if I were to truly love someone, I’d place their happiness over my own, even to the extent of causing my own suffering.  That’s what’s really missing in the modern day notion of Love.  There is this idea that loving someone else is for personal gratification.  A person will marry for money, or because they, themselves, need someone.  It’s the same thing.  Sometimes relationships based on this sort of thing work, in the sense that they last, but is it successful?  If a relationship is based on “I need you,” the idea of putting the other person first is lost.  Mutual self-interest is a powerful thing in the economic world, but it has no place in Love.  Love is about companionship, servitude, and trust.  When I truly fall in love, I expect there to be a sense of belonging, and not of chains.  I joke with my friends sometimes about not dating because I don’t want to go to jail and since the experiences are so similar, to avoid one is to avoid the other.  If and when I fall in love, there will be a sense of freedom.  Like letting a bird fly free, and yet it chooses to stay around because it enjoys your company.  That’s what love is.  Love is a choice.  I will choose who I fall in love with.  It may stem from an attraction I can’t help, but the woman who holds my love will do so out of a choice I make.  And she will be able to choose whether or not she loves me.  That’s what makes love so special.  If we were to relegate love to something that depends on a series of random events, wouldn’t that be taking something away from it?

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